mE venting out

okey i'm really aggrevated...... today finds me at my wits end. i have been waiting for a certain someone to make good on a transaction that just does not seem to be forthcoming. i'm sooo tired of second guessing. its gotten old really quickly. it's not that i'm impatient, i think waiting one month without an outter qulifies me. what it comes down to is the persons lack of communication and yes, consideration. were you not present when we made the arrangement. dang. an email or text msg would suffice.i hate not knowing! it pisses me off. note to self: any requests for future transactions with this person will be cordially declined with a "HELL TO THE NO"!!!!!!

Momentary Lapse

Mistaken identity?
I think not!
Your scheming ways have materialized
In the wisdom of my understanding.

Should you redeem yourself?
As weak as you seem,
I believe that true courage has not begotten you,
Alas, it lays abaiding in your fears.

Speak to me oh tired one!
You have found me at a vulnerable moment.
I will pause and listen to your ravings
From this,
I will let you be at my mercy!

Am I vindictive
Or heartless even?
Maybe!
Do you dare find out.....


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Standing

disapproval
fingers pointed
standing too close to the edge.

scorn
whispering echoes
standing too close to the edge.

ignorance
eyes provoking
standing too close to the edge.

laughter
shattering silence
standing firm...defying the edge.

forgivness
falling biases
standing firm...defying the edge.

freedom
arms outstretched
embracing moments

LIVE.


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Wedding Nostolgia

so my boy Roberto had his wedding yesterday, like most Italian weddings this one was huge! he comes from a big family so there was close to 250 guests at the reception easy. i swear i haven't seen so many Italians in the same place at the same time... i so know how to speak Italian now!! his bride Kelli is of Irish decent so her part of the family were not as flamboyant as Rob's but nonetheless they equaled them in pride and generosity. the wedding was wonderful, the food exceptional and the drinks endless. they rocked the open bar...my appletinies and cosmopolitians were hot!!!! it was a good night, my peeps and i got our groove on and we killed the dance floor. p.s. to my g'bear Loui "it's raining men" was so all about you! so there it is... here's a toast to two beautiful people, two lives becoming one, a unity made in heaven... God bless always Roberto and Kelli.

My Pain

i hung up the phone
how could you?
disbelief distorts my vision.
confusion cries!

the taste of betrayal
clearly defies my happiness.
it defines me
contentment disgraced!

picture perfect caricature
like puppet you moved me.
without a doubt i consented
succumbing, your control overwhelmed!

but now...it broke
my hypnotic trance shatters
like drops of realization
the fixation is over.

you lied
you smiled
you cheated
you smiled
you corrupted...but i let you!

NO MORE!

i hurt
pain laces every memory.
i can't breath!
because of you, i gave you power

forgive my trusting
forgive my ignorance
forgive my love.

NO MORE!


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Waiting

Why do you make me wait
Am I not important.
Endless tears I have shed for you
Sleepless nights I have tossed and turned
Waiting.......

Can I have some reassurance
You speak
Your words are sweet as honey
But I must not be led
Bittersweet they become
When opposite sides we take.

Hold my hands for I am lost
Can't you see?
I'm reaching for you.

I want to smell your scent
Remind me.
But my memory fades
The reality of today is more eminant
Here without you
Waiting........


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

What is

Dreamt about you again last night!
I reached across
You disappeared.

Now, I lay awake
Thinking.
Is it a sign
A trigger for worry?

Damn!
What possessed me.
I contemplated a situation
Way beyond my control.

Now,As sleep fails me
I reminise
About
What was
What is
and
What will be.

Imaginations runs wild
I must stop!
It plants deceitful thoughts
Teasing my mind.

Come a new day,
I breath in it's promises
The scent of endless possibilities.
Oh!...... I must close my eyes

And remember what is.


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Faith Shaken

Have faith in me you say!
But I've lost sight
of the vision of happiness you painted so eloquantly!

Do you blame me?
Now, all I see is the sadness in their eyes
and the yearning of things that cannot be.

I hear the cry
but I must be strong!
My mask is slowly unrevealing.

How much longer must I endure?
A taste of poverty,
an education no less.

We have learnt
but we still do not understand.
It's too long!

A test of endurance
Who is the winner?
Victims of circumstance is what we are!

The race was lost even before it began.
STOP!!!!!!
Negativity flee!
Your confusing me.........

'Le Journey

Can this emptiness I feel inside
be the beginning
and the end of a better tomorrow?

I turn around
looking for answers
but all I find are more questions!

Am I being selfish to believe that
my emotional, mental and physical needs have been neglected?
I wonder if you feel it too!

But as I scream inside
from the pain and the hurt
I cry to you but your not there!

Hello!
I thought we were in this together,
alas my spirit is broken once again!

Maybe I'm too needy
but how can that be,
if your not around to make that a possibility!

Now I must stay positive and focused
because it's not always going to be like this right?
Find me strength to stand strong and courage to go on!

Let this be the reason we celebrate
when we overcome adversity
to finally realize our DREAM!

LORD, only you can see me through this one.....

© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Tribal Pride

i wonder how one must feel if they are without culture? how do you identify with the rest of the populous who practice their traditions and embrace their unique cultures.do you feel or don't you?? i wonder!!

can you ever feel the pride that one has when they adorn their traditional dressing or partake in their traditional dancing... it's indescribable.the euphoria of belonging to a society that is bigger then you'll ever be; an eternal connection to your ancestry, what a rush!

when you practice the rites and rituals that have been passed down from fore-fathers to fore-mothers then you know why it's important to keep your culture alive; IT IS WHO YOU ARE!

world, when i mean culture, i mean rites of passages, customs and rituals. and No, culture does not equate to BBQs or cookouts!

to those brothers and sisters who have lost touch with their culture, please connect back to your rootz; stay true and strong, it is our bloodline, our strength and our power!

Confusion

Is it possible that I misunderstood?
Frame by frame I analyse
I rationalize and I personalize

But abstract images
contort the significance.
Insecurity camoflages in envy.

It creeps to the stillness of my trust!
Burning a hole of doubt
in the fortress of my imagination.

You run
but the scent of disception betrays!
WHY????


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA

Hidden Truth

Mistaken identity?
I think not!
Your scheming ways have materialized
in the wisdom of my understanding.

Should you redeem yourself?
As weak as you seem
I believe that true courage has not begotten you
alas, it lays abaiding in your fears.

Speak to me oh tired one!
You have found me at a valnurable moment
I will pause and listen to your ravings.
From this, I will let you be at my mercy!

Am I vindictive
or heartless even
Maybe!
Do you dare find out.......


© 2003-2008 islandDIVA