I am not ME

Hello WORLD! Its been awhile since I've written in my blog, funny though, don't know why?! So much has happened since my last post. I had muchness to write about... but, but, but...(sigh). All that venting I wanted to do....gone! All that anger I wanted to release...gone! All that sadness consuming me...gone! What is left is a new beginning. A beginning that should have started so so many years ago.

So I write this as the old me, who became the pathetic me, and is reverting back to the original me! ..doesn't make any sense? I know!! Just understand I am a new person; metaphorically I have become a BETTER me. Its amazing how a life change can make you come to that realization. That single(slap in the face) second, where you shake your head in bewilderment, and say to yourself, 'who the f&%k is this person'.

I took a step back, and looked at me...WOW! the person I saw didn't even resemble your gurl. I saw a person who had settled for less. A person who had made so many compromises, her whole life was a compromise. Not a single thing about her reflected those passions that use to burn so deep they would resonate adrenalin energy...like a hunter waiting for its prey...GONE!!!

In its place was an empty void, a functional void no less, deprived from the very source of its uniqueness. I had become comfortable in a situation that was depressing my spirit and consuming my person. This was not, what was foreseen, this was an accident of nature.

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! My oppressor you have set me FREE!! YES, you hurt, betrayed and manipulated me. YES, you destroyed all that we built together... I cried bitterly, I screamed angrily and I worried and stressed.NO, you gave no comfort and you gave no joy. BUT, despite what you did, you gave me something priceless, you gave me back "ME".

WELCOME BACK MEL@NE$I@N ME......